First Trimester Update

WOOHOO! We doin the damn thang! This is a huge milestone and I’m so happy to be almost out of my first trimester. Twelve weeks is a time in pregnancy when your chances of miscarrying drop significantly and hormones hopefully start to level out, which means I MIGHT start to feel better soon. 

If you’re new to my page, this will be the third baby I’m having with a midwife in my home. Our first was born in the car on a bridge and our second was almost born in a toilet, needless to say I birth babies like a Pez dispenser so we’re grateful to have found Rosemary Birthing Center as they’ve truly let me birth the way I want/need to.

We had our first appointment at 11 weeks and I was measuring a little big so we had an early ultrasound that revealed one healthy beautiful baby that’s about a week ahead. I’ve been so enamored with these ultrasound pictures because we’ve never had an ultrasound done this early before. It’s so amazing to see their features this small. 

So far this pregnancy has been the hardest of the three since I’ve been sick every day/night on top of juggling two small humans, a puppy and a husband. I didn’t have any symptoms until I was over five weeks which was a nice break considering both my other pregnancies I had symptoms within 72 hours. With being sick now though it’s obviously effected the amount/types of food I’ve been eating so that’s also been hard. I don’t really have a regiment anymore so I’ve been drinking a lot of protein shakes and simply eating whatever I’m hungry for at the time. While I honestly feel like I’ve done nothing but complain recently, I’ve never felt more blessed to be where I am right now. It’s difficult to feel so out-of-body all the time but I still break down in tears and thank God (even in the midst of throwing up) for keeping this baby in my stomach and letting him/her grow however the necessity. I don’t really want to type this out in fear of anything bringing upon me but I’ve been so scared of miscarrying this time. I have a disgusting, overwhelming fear that I won’t be able to meet this baby. I’ve known so many losses lately that even though I’ve carried two babies successfully, it feels like being pregnant is impossible..so feeling anything feels better to me than feeling nothing. Maybe I’m okay with being sick I guess. 

I haven’t been working very much lately which has been a little challenging financially, but have made some changes to my schedule that will hopefully help with that. We’re lucky to have nearly everything we need for either gender from our two babies we already have so preparing for this baby is mostly just paying insurance costs, which I cannot stress enough is SO IMPORTANT to look over before you get pregnant. Our deductible went up enormously and we’re paying like 300x what we paid for Liam and Lavender. We actually would be paying less if we went to a hospital but because we’ve established such a great relationship with our midwives we’re still choosing to go that route. 

Overall I’m a hot mess hardly functional broke ass human at the moment but we’re seriously over the moon for this baby. If you read this far I love you and thank you for caring about our tribe! ❤️